Peace is not just the lack of war, but a state of being, an option to choose, something to go after; ‘Seek peace and pursue it’ (Psalm 34:14). Lately, I have been feeling turbulent, I have not felt fully peaceful in a while, my mental state has made this more difficult. Amidst anxiety, I have wondered how I continue to pursue peace.
The concept of peace is much more tangible when I think of Jesus as the full representation of peace. Perhaps peace is to wieldy of a concept to go it alone, perhaps thats why making it personable is necessary. To make it about going after Jesus. If I keep close to Him then peace fills my heart; ‘Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts’ (Colossians 3:15).
Jesus was so at peace with himself that he slept through a storm at sea (Mark 4: 38). I would love to have that level of peace within. The truth is, we do have access to that same level of peace, full access to it. So why the anxiety? there’s no need for me to be anxious if I am casting my burdens on God (Peter 5: 7). So why then does anxiety still happen? why am I here as an inpatient in a psychiatric hospital? how has this happened when I have Jesus?
I think this has happened because sometimes I take my eyes off of him and look at my problems instead, and like when Peter walked on water, he started to falter when he took his eyes off of Jesus (Matt 14: 30). My faith waivers even though Jesus is right in front of me and my relationship and connection is good. I am like Peter.
I have had a more steady week this week because I have been better at looking to Jesus, despite many distractions. I have to stay focused. I think that is the difference – focus! To stay peaceful, I must stay focused on He that is peace, seek Him, pursue Him and lift my eyes only to Him! It is not easy, but gratefully He is still faithful to me even when I am not being faithful to Him and remembering His promises for me. He is always there, always with great unfailing love and redemption for me.
Jesus is peace and everything that is about peace. It’s only Him we need to seek.